He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
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My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
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Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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