addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
