That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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