Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
where does the pee come out of this thing
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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