how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Maybe he injected his testicle?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize