So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
