i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
