I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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