Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
