Don't make out with my wife yet
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
