is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
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Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
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She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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