I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize