I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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