Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
