Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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