i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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