We're facebook friends in real life
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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