I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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