By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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