Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
I am invincible.
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I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
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Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.