I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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