I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
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I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
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I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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