Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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