Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize