love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
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He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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