I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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