why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
