Have you finally orgasmed yet?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
