She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize