You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
even my farts smell like vagina
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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