Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
