He asked me if I "almost moaned"
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize