All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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