They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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