we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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