I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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