Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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