yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
