this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
