everyone is single if you try hard enough
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
it glows. i had to have it.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
