PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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