just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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