So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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