He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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