the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
