I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
