I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I just had sex on a roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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