I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Everything about him screamed your future.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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