my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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