3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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