4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
